Listen Very Carefully - The ’Allo ’Allo! Podcast

S3 E10 The Nouvion Oars

More merriment in Kim’s kitchen. Laughs aplenty in Fanny’s bedroom as Michelle sets up a radio disguised as a dummy buzzard. Some might say it was not the only buzzard in the room... There is a lot of splashing about as the whole town takes to the local lake for another of the Resistance’s hare-brained schemes. Richard recounts a schoolboy prank, involving a pack of beagles and an aniseed trail. 

S3 E9 The Gestapo for the High Jump (2)

Rene opens the episode with a massage. As his ankles disapear behind is ears, who should come in but – you guessed it – Lieutenant Gruber. Outstanding makeup effects as the café staff disguise themselves with the help of the make-up artists of the horror star Boris Karloff. Georgio the cat makes an appearance in Kim's kitchen, while two lovebirds canoodle beak to beak outside the window. Lots of fun with the Italian rabble, as ever, and Kim admits to a slight pash for one of them.

S3 E8 The Gestapo for the High Jump

It’s anyone's guess why this episode is called The Gestapo for the High Jump, as there is very little Gestapo, and even less high jumping, but perhaps there were once some scenes that have since  been cut. Interspersed with behind-the-scenes yarns, the Peasants share fond memories of the days when domestic holidays were the norm, and en-suite batrooms were not. Listen out for some observations on possible upstaging moments...

S3 E7 Desperate Doings in the Graveyard

The more sharp-eyed of our viewers will notice change in the appearance of Monsieur Leclerc. With the loss of Jack Haig between series, his place has been taken by the magnificent farceur, Derek Royle, in the role of his brother, Ernest, and a mighty fine job he makes of it. A high spot of this episode is the magnificent swahbuckling sword fight between Royle and Kenneth Connor, which showcasess the expert phyisicality that made these two actors famous. Another corset for Helga, which Kim admits to having in her house, but refuses to model it for Guy and Richard. She also swears the she did not purloin it from the set. Yeah right...

S3 E6 All in Disgeese

Talk in the kitchen turns, as it must from time to time, to sausages – Gorden’s handling of them, and the fact that the saucy innuendo and naughty sight gags went over the heads of the children watching. When Gruber commandeers Helga’s uniform, the patrons of the café are treated to another of her spectacular corsets.

S3 E5 Down the Drain

Gathered once more around the kitchen table, the talk turns to Kim’s vexation, lasting 40 years, at being cut from this episode, while Richard learns that he too has been excised. But they manage to put on a brave face, and are soon chuckling at Monsieur Alphonse, whose dicky ticker and tricky truss are put under strain as the ladies of the cafe appear in their scanties. Gruber does not relish searching under Fanny’s bedclothes for the Enigma machine, any more than does Mimi at being dropped down a sewer.

S3 E4 Wedding Bloss

Interesting episode this week, as David Croft aand Jeremy Lloyd stood aside to welcome two new writers – John Chapman and Ian Davidson. The trio discuss slight differences in style, and the verdict overall is deemed to be positive. Much hilarity at Kim’s kitchen table as Guy treats us to impressions of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer and a horse. Gorden deftly covers a minor setback, and the team discuss coping with things that go wrong during live theatre performances.

S3 E3 An Enigma Variation

As we reach the 50th episode, agreement is unanimous that the writers Croft and Lloyd are on top form. At a ball for the generals, attended by all the regular characters, Mimi is hidden in a double bass case, while Yvette hides with Monsieur Alphonse in the piano – forcing his dicky ticker into overdrive. Flick and von Smallhausen, disguised as maids, display their pretty ankles, and René risks being fingered for the disappearance of Gruber’s little tank. In the Land of Pod, Kim gets a panto babe caught between her legs.

S3 E2 Train of Events

In this TV episode, the actors are squashed on to a train set (not a trainset, though not much bigger), and talk about the fun of miming rolling carriages. Richard, believing his scenes were all pre-filmed, plays truant from the studio on a holiday with his fiancée, and Is forced to make a breakneck journey to get back for an unscheduled scene. Guy recounts working with Johnny Depp, and lots of fun with listeners’ letters.

S3 E1 Flight to Geneva

After a lengthy hiatus, Kim, Guy and Richard are overjoyed to find themselves back in the studio – or kitchen as some people call it – together with Ron and the cats. Subjects under discussion range from marvelling at Gorden’s delivery of his opening monologue, to Kim flipping her knickers on to a hatstand, and an encounter with the New Zealand police while on tour with Su Pollard from Hi de Hi!

Bonus Episode – Willing Spirits Pilot

Now that the podcast is on a short hiatus at the end of Season 2, we bring you a bonus episode – Willing Spirits, a the pilot for a radio sitcom that we created during lockdown, using smartphones and zoom. The cast was scattered across the globe, from Australia to Kent, via Herfordshire and the Cotswolds. This presented a number of challenges, and the quality is not as polished as it would be had it been recorded in a studio. However, we think it will still entertain, and depending on the response that we receive from airing this, we will consider re-recording it, along with the rest of the series. Some of our more sharp-eared listeners will recognise the voice of Jan Francis, who played Yvette in Secret Army – the drama series of which ‘Allo ‘Allo! was based, and whose character was the model for Michelle of the Resistance.

See Kim, Guy and Richard live in the Listen Very Carefully stage show at:

Guildford Yvonne Arnaud – 11 October 2025 (Matinee)

Salford, Lowry Theatre – 12 October 2025 (Matinee)

Shrewsbury, Severn Theatre (Evening)

Book now at Fane.co.uk

S2 E20 Land Mines for London

Gathered around Kim’s table once again, the Peasants talk about Kim removing Richard’s trousers, sharing a jacuzzi with the red hot 1980s’ band Curiosity Killed the Cat, and many other matters of world importance. As they toast the final episode of Season 2 of the podcast with a glass of Prosecco (any excuse), Richard is made to drink his from a plastic cup, as he is not to be trusted with glass. Lots of plot, as usual, involving another elaborate scheme by Michellle of the Resistance to get the airman away, but as usual, it all turns to dust.

This episode marks the end of Season 2. But we are not going away, and will be back in a few weeks with more analysis  of the great questions of the universe.

See Kim, Guy and Richard live in The Listen Very Carefully stage show at:

Guildford Yvonne Arnaud – 11 October 2025 (Matinee)

Salford, Lowry Theatre – 12 October 2025 (Matinee)

Shrewsbury, Severn Theatre (Evening)

Tickets are selling fast, so book now at Fane.co.uk

You can also watch a video of this podcast at: https://www.youtube.com/@HelgaGruberFlick/videos

 

S2 E19 Puddings Can Go Off

Plenty of the usual lively chat from Kim’s kitchen. Monsieur Leclerc puts in a brief appearance as an exploding pudding seller, but is ejected before he has a chance to speak. In a scene involving Lieutenant Gruber, the writers are powerless to resist a “they eat faggots for breakfast gag”. Kim’s unusually tanned complexion and the liveliness of the acting hint at a recent break from filming. Disguised as monks, Flick and von Smallhausen look even sexier than usual, and soon find themselves tangled up in the bell tower of a church – or, as von Smallhausen puts it: “suspended by the clappers”. With the second series of the podcast soon to take a short break, the peasants float the idea of airing the pilot of an audio comedy series that they have recorded, with the possibility of releasing the series as a podcast.

See Kim, Guy and Richard live in The Listen Very Carefully stage show at:

Guildford Yvonne Arnaud – 11 October 2025 (Matinee)

Salford, Lowry Theatre – 12 October 2025 (Matinee)

Shrewsbury, Severn Theatre (Evening)

Tickets are selling fast, so book now at Fane.co.uk

You can also watch a video of this podcast at: https://www.youtube.com/@HelgaGruberFlick/videos

S2 E18 Money to Burn

The  episode commences with a duet from René and Edith. Needless to say, one of them is more in tune than the other. The airmen, concealed in a pair of large mines, are being trained in how to release themselves in mid-air by unscrewing their nuts. Once again, despite elaborate groundwork by Michelle of the Resistance, things do not go according to plan. In the kitchen, Kim’s hospitality towards her fellow peasants is as lavish as ever, and as they toil at their work, the heatwave raging outside makes extra ice essential in the gin.

See Kim, Guy and Richard live in The Listen Very Carefully stage show at:

Guildford Yvonne Arnaud – 11 October 2025 (Matinee)

Salford, Lowry Theatre – 12 October 2025 (Matinee)

Shrewsbury, Severn Theatre (Evening)

Tickets are selling fast, so book now at Fane.co.uk

You can also watch a video of this podcast at: https://www.youtube.com/@HelgaGruberFlick/videos

S2 E17 Going Like a Bomb

René has arrived at the café still wearing his hospital gown after last week's escapade. The fun starts right away as Gruber makes an entrance, and René tries to avoid turning around. Flick orders von Smallhausen to be smuggled into the mortuary, disguised as a corpse, Bertorelli’s trousers are used to hide the money, and the Colonel impersonates a French peasant on the telephone. Despite starting the pod by saying there is not much to say, Kim and friends soon find plenty of lively stories to share around the kitchen table. 

See Kim, Guy and Richard live in The Listen Very Carefully stage show at:

Guildford Yvonne Arnaud – 11 October 2025 (Matinee)

Salford, Lowry Theatre – 12 October 2025 (Matinee)

Shrewsbury, Severn Theatre (Evening)

Tickets are selling fast, so book now at Fane.co.uk

You can also watch a video of this podcast at: https://www.youtube.com/@HelgaGruberFlick/videos

S2 E16 The Exploding Bedpan

The Peasants have to persuade themselves to come in from Kim and John's sunlit garden to record this week’s pod. But it turns out to be no hardship, as the episode gallops along. Monsieur Alphonse finds himself in Herr Flick's cellar, being questioned by Helga in connection with the money from the bank robbery. But the sight of her stocking tops is too much for his dicky ticker, and he soon finds himself in hospital – a German one – which is fraught with jeopardy. There are the usual antics, as everyone seeks ways to prevent Monsieur Alphonse from spilling the beans about the stolen Gestapo cash. As ever, there is no shortage of chat and fun around Kim’s kitchen table.

See Kim, Guy and Richard live in the Listen Very Carefully stage show at:

Guildford Yvonne Arnaud – 11 October 2025 (Matinee)

Salford, Lowry Theatre – 12 October 2025 (Matinee)

Shrewsbury, Severn Theatre (Evening)

Book now at Fane.co.uk

 

You can also watch a video of this podcast at: https://www.youtube.com/@HelgaGruberFlick/videos